First Year Linguists Rules

Nobu
[+phonology
+phonetics
+morphology(?)
-syntax
-historical linguistics
-sociolinguistics]

Janie
[-phonology
-phonetics
+morphology(?)
+syntax
-historical linguistics
+sociolinguistics]

Kyung-Ae
[-phonology
-phonetics
+morphology
+syntax
-historical linguistics
+sociolinguistics]

Joey
[-phonology
+phonetics
+morphology
+syntax
-historical linguistics
-sociolinguistics]


* ? indicates my doubts; even though they insist they're +morphology linguists, there are some evidences which make me question if they are really +morphology.

* Rules for future variant

1. Socioculturalization of Nobu

Nobu -> Nobu / Janie _____ Kyung-Ae
[-socio] [+socio] [+socio] [+socio]


2. Koreanization of Joey

Joey -> Joey / Janie _____ Kyung-Ae
[-Korean] [+Korean] [+Korean] [+Korean]

God Bless My Womb

I've just found a poem that I wrote in 1999. I knew Lakoff back then. After all, I was already interested in language and gender at the time. How come I forgot all about this...

God, Bless My Womb
-Women Talk Differently from Men

Lakoff once said
Women have a different language from men.
I became “bilingual” to succeed
In this male-dominated world.

But think about it.
Will I really be certain
If I am using the right “language”
To the right person n the right place ?

"Difference shouldn’t be deficiency
For speech is different from language. "
What the hell are they talking about?
I’ll talk like a woman, walk like a woman,
Live like a woman, and sing for my womb.
So please God, bless my womb
And let me keep my own language.

Things about You-Jin

Linguists, it's finally her turn. I've been meaning to write about her. It took me some time to figure out, but here it goes.

1. She laughs...
hard over anything. At times she falls off from a chair because she laughs too hard.

2. She's married.
How much I was disappointed... I don't understand why all cute, decent girls are married... Bummer...

3. She's Taiwanese.
Yet her English is near perfection. Is it because you're good with phonetics?

4. She reminds me of...
Garfield. Take a look. I'm not saying she looks like the mean, fat, and orange cat. Her big eyes, round cheeks, and big grin. remind me of Garfield.

5. She has grey hair
There is a reason she can talk to Kobe for hours. Rumor has it. It's all because of their common ground-grey hair

6. She lives in the lab.
When I go to the lab to pick up something at night, she's there. When I go to the lab to pick up something on Sunday, she's there. Mostly she's with Irena or Nobu. I've advised her a numerous times. 'You should go home, You-Jin. I know it's hard for you linguist but try to have life, ok?'

7. She's caring.
I've heard of her concerning about people around her. I always reply, 'ah, s/he'll be ok' but how sweet she is. Damn it....

8. She doesn't seem to cook.
Any plan to cook for me some day soon? Your friend Wen-ling cooks for me quite often.

9. She loves stuffed animals.
Hop in her car. You'll know what I mean. There are more stuffed animals than I've had for my entire life. Oh, there is mashmaro, the Korean mean rabbit, too.

1o. Hop in her car with a risk of falling a sleep.
She plays very sleepy songs which makes me want to bang my head on the window. The worst thing was that Nobu was in the back seat. And he kept saying, 'but I love this song.' Gimme a breeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak!

p.s. Whenever I think of you-not that I think of you often- all I remember is your brown backpack and orange shoes. They seem to be your trademark. Don't you guys agree?

Tired...

A toga party was fun, but talking on the phone early in the Sunday morning after the party could be really tiring. Should've turned off the phone.

Couldn't finish revising my paper, transcribing data.... don't feel like it. Wanna have a big dinner and watch a nice movie. Then go to sleep... How about that?

Still debating something... Will I do it or not? I don't have a problem with making decisions, but it's very hard for me to make a decision this time. Should I play low and see how it goes or should I take a charge of it?

Damn... should've slept, so I can think clearly...

I miss Korean food... I wanna go to White Swan in Oxnard... am having craving for Korean dishes...

F*ck... I'm stressed out! Let's straight myself up from Monday. Being lazy for a week is enough. Enough of grieving.

I Hate Transcription!

Y'all know how much I hated transcription in fall/2004. Now that I deal with my own research, I have to transcribe alot of data. Of course I don't give a damn much on details-not like Jack wanted me to do for the class. BUT it still takes a freaking long time and is a very tedious job which doesn't inspire me much.

Is there any way I can have others do it for me? Do you know anybody who's capable of transcribing Korean data?

Another technical problem... The numbering of regional insertion is weird. When I begin transcribing other parts another day, it begins from number 1 again. Which means I have a couple of number 1, 2, 3...etc. How do I deal with this? Carlos, love, a technical geek, a musician, any idea?

Janie and Cookies

I question the identity of cookies that Janie baked for Nobu's birthday party.

My arguments are:
1. Cookies are hard or soft, but Janie's cookies were neither.
2. Cookies are sweet. i.e.) chocolate chip cookies, oatmeal raisin cookies, sugar cookies, peanut butter cookies, and more. However, Janie's cookies were not sweet at all.
3. Ingredients are suspicious. She claimed that she baked them using Korean flour made of various crops. Now, can we call it "cookie" dough? She also insisted that they were "healthy" cookies. Who gives a damn whether cookies are healthy food or not? Cookies are cookies. They are sweet and make us happy. Call me an "essentialist" or it is a categorization, whatever. That's their identity. Period.

Janie, I specifically told you that you gotta bake "tasty" cookies. My request was based on my previous experience on unidentified so-called-cookies of yours. You insisted that you baked yummy cookies yesterday morning. I trusted you. But what happened in the evening? I found one piece of cookie that somebody had just one bite and left the rest on the plate. The evidence strongly shows that your cookies were not tasteful.

Linguists, I'm telling you. Although she says that she loves to cook, it does not mean she's a good cook. That's called "deceiving statement." Do NOT fall for it.

My Roommate uses me!

OK, I admit it. I got my bachelor degree by cheating.

Here is the deal.

I registered French class in the first year-second language other than English is mandatory in Korea. I didn't go to class for several months but finally went to class to take a final. It was NOT French class. It was German-I put the wrong code. What did I know about German? I failed the class.

In my senior year, my advisor told me that I had to retake the German class in order to graduate. I registered German. Then again, what do I know about German? I went to take a final again but couldn't write anything on the test. The Professor came to me and asked why I wasn't writing anything, so I said I didn't know anything. He looked at me and slapped a guy's head sitting in front of me. 'What are you doing? Do you want to see your senior not graduating? Pass your sheet.' I copied his answers and got B.

Jessica went to a TA meeting yesterday and told my story. She won the best prize.

GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAT! She used my ridiculous past to get the prize!

Think about the diversity

If Earth's population was shrunk into a village of just 100 people - with all the human ratios existing in the world still remaining - what would this tiny, diverse village look like?

That's exactly what Phillip M. Harter, a medical dr. at Stanford University School of Medicine, attempted to figure out.

This is what he found.

57 would be Asian

21 would be European

14 would be from the Western Hemisphere

8 would be African

52 would be female

48 would be male

70 would be non-Christian

30 would be white

70 would be nonwhite

30 would be Christian

89 would be heterosexual

11 would be homosexual

6 people would possess
59 percent of the entire worlds wealth,
and all 6 would be from the United States.

80 would live in substandard housing

70 would be unable to read

50 would suffer from malnutrition

1 would be near death.

1 would be pregnant

1 would have a college education

1 would own a computer

The Sock-eating Monster

There is a sock-eating monster in a washer and even in a dryer. Whenever I do my laundry, I always lose one sock. I'm serious. Only one sock at a time... I keep buying socks, but I don't know how long I can keep up with it.

Believe it or not, I hate the monster! Throw up my socks, bastard!

Generalization-Mathematics

여자와 남자(Women and Men)

1. ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romace 똑똑한남자 + 똑똑한여자 = 로맨스
Smart man + dumb woman = affair 똑똑한남자 + 멍청한여자 = 바람
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage 멍청한남자 + 똑똑한여자 = 결혼
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy 멍청한남자 + 멍청한여자 = 임신

2. OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit 똑똑한 상사 + 똑똑한 부하직원 = 이윤..흑자!
Smart boss + dumb employee = production 똑똑한 상사 + 멍청한 부하직원 = 생산
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion 멍청한 상사 + 똑똑한 부하직원 = 진급!
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime 멍청한 상사 + 멍청한 부하직원 = 연장근무!


3. SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. 남자는 꼭 필요한 1달러짜리 물건을 2달러에 사온다.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn"t need.
여자는 전혀 필요하지 않은 2달러짜리 물건을 1달러에 사온다.

4. GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
여자는 결혼할 때 까지만 미래에 대해 걱정한다.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
남자는 전혀 걱정없이 살다가 결혼하고 나서 걱정이 생긴다.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
성공한 남자란 마누라가 쓰는 돈보다 많이 버는 사람이다.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
성공한 여자는 그런 남자를 만나는 것이다.

5. HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
남자와 행복하게 살려면 반드시 최대한 많이 그 남자를 이해하려 노력해야하고 사랑은 조금만.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
여자와 행복하게 살려면 반드시 그녀를 아주 많이 사랑하되 절대 그녀를 이해하려해선 안된다.

6. LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
결혼한 남자는 평생혼자산 남자보다 수명이 길지만 결혼한 남자는 죽고 싶어하는 사람이 많다.

7. PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn"t.
여자는 결혼 후 남자가 변하길 바라지만 남자는 변하지 않는다.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won"t change, and she does.
남자는 결혼해도 여자가 변하지 않길 바라지만 여자는 변한다.

8. DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
여자의 말다툼의 끝에는 항상 결론이 있다.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
남자의 말다툼의 끝에는 다른 말다툼의 시작이 따라온다

I Hate Hangover

Yesterday was fun. Learned how to sail for the first time in my life. Hiked out from the boat and enjoyed flying over the ocean.

Began drinking after took off the wetsuit. Then drank some more. Had dinner and drank, and played some stupid ball game, totally lost and drank.

Then came back to Goleta, stopped by at a bar, drank a little more.

Got up very early in the morning with a serious headache and stomachache. Took some pills, went back to sleep. Got up about 10 am, ate something, went back to sleep.

Still don't feel like I can put myself together to do homework.... damn.... it....